centre of the universe - the dreaming: Lunch

10/30/2008: "Lunch" I made a really, really, really, really really, really, really, really-really good sandwich today. Two of them, in fact. I make homemade mayonnaise, and so today's lunch was curry tuna salad.

So.

Good.

Seriously. I took teeny, tiny little bites so I could savour the taste of the sandwich, the saltiness of the fish, and the mayonnaise's tangy, tart, smooth flavour. And the spicy curry...that back-of-your-mouth flavour that fills your sinuses and brings to mind a hot, dry wind.

You just don't even know. That's your problem. You just don't. Even. Know.

Although, if you watched that video I told you to watch, you'd be closer to knowing than would someone who had defied my counsel and not watched the video. Or worse. Someone who UNwatched the video.

I know, I know. "That's crazy talk, cenobyte. Pull yourself together, man."

I'm just sayin'. Folks what unwatch things slowly unravel the finely woven fabric of space-time. Squarely placed on their shoulders is the responsibility for the universe tumbling in on itself, spiralling out of control, down, down into an unfathomable ether. Unwatchers and people who don't know how to use apostrophes correctly. Bastards.

"Solano" "Post Apocalypse"

8 Comments

Coyote , on Friday, 31st October:

As a member of BAD (Bastards Against Discrimination, founding members, Viper Pilot and Coyote) I demand you apologize for your use of the word bastard as a pejoritive! Many great people (Like the founders of BAD) were born to unwed parents and don't take kindly to the misuse of our given title. We're takin' it back! We are not unwatchers or misusers of apostrophes.

We have lawyers! Don't make us use'um!

(This equally psychotic response to the insane ramblings of a crazy mayonnaise maker brought to you by BAD. Don't make us beat you like only a bastard can.)

cenobyte , on Friday, 31st October:

Screw you, taxpayer!!
You can't censor me!
And, for the record, I have *every right* to use the word Bastard, as I come from a long line of them.

Coyote , on Friday, 31st October:

Your parents were unwed? Maybe that's why they kept killing all the pets...

cenobyte , on Friday, 31st October:

Well, *technically*, they were wed when I was born. By a couple of weeks. But there was a certain sense of urgency to the whole thing.

Coyote , on Friday, 31st October:

They no bastard you be! Although I'm sure The Captain is. And you want truly sad? I can't remember if you and His Nibs is married. *sigh* This was been a crappy week, at least I have Ceno to amuse me with useless debates about the negative or postiive use of the word bastard.

cenobyte , on Friday, 31st October:

Coyote, for your reference: http://www.cenobyte.ca/words/archives/00000899.htm

Note: our children were born in 1999 and 2004, respectively.

Etymologically, "bastard" means "a child conceived of a man by someone other than his wife". Since my mother was not my father's wife when I was conceived, I fit the bill. Of course, Etymologically, "bastard" simply meant someone of low birth...bastard boys were often called "packsaddle sons", insinuating they were conceived on an improvised bed. ie. Not the marriage bed.

So nyah.

Coyote , on Friday, 31st October:

Ahhhh I see we use the same online etymological dictionary. Here I thought bastard was birth not conception. Since it is conception, there is a lot more bastards out there than before! Unite bastards! Join together and take back the name so it's not an insult but a title of pride! No more low birth!

And both your little ones are invited to join BAD. You too... you bastard.

the_iron_troll , on Friday, 31st October:

And the NERVE of some of those apostrophes abusers! Why, they don't even put in the little bit of time it would take to use them! If you could see their poor, curly faces, weeping over their poor bruised bodies. Period is simply beside himself most days.

Soon, our laggard society shall give these noble Punctuation Pals the respect they deserve. I shall see to it.

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